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Israelcube
Israelcube | nativename = Kubiyat YIsra'el | founded = 14 May 1948 | ended = | image = Israel-0.png | caption = I did 9/11It's Falafel time Yueah! | reality = State of Israel | government = Unitary parliamentary | personality = Has a primal instinct to return to the Promised Land of Canaan (wait of minute am already here). | language = Hebrew Arabic English | type = Hypercube or Cube | capital = Jerusalemcube | affiliation = Zionism | religion = Judaism (main) Islam Christianity Druze Bahá'í Faith | military = Israel Defense Force: Best in Mizrach Tichon 1967 BEST YEAR OF MY LIFE !!! never lost suck it iranball!! | friends = USAball EUball NATOball UKball Canadaball Franceball Germanyball Indiaball Russiaball Egyptball Jordanball Saudi Arabiaball Turkeyball Azerbaijanball South Lebanonball Switzerlandball Serbiaball Greeceball Polandball Kurdistanball Moroccoball South Koreaball Tringapore Georgiaball | enemies = Naziball ISISball Palestineball (duh) Hamasball Iranball Syriaball Iraqball Lebanonball Algeriaball Pakistanball Malaysiaball Venezuelaball Cubaball North Koreaball SPQRball (formerly) Philistineball (formerly) Indonesiaball | likes = Canaan, Finance, Kosher food, Grapes, Olives, The Torah, The Talmud, hating kebab, peace, homosexuals, controlling stupid goyims | hates = Kebab, persecution, nazis, holocaust, Palestineball (they cannot into UNball!), diplomatic dwarfs anyone who doesn't recognize me but helps and recognize Palestine,Jesus Christ, Every thing and all things associated with ChristianityEveryone who respect Palestine | onlypredecessor = British Palestinecube | predicon = British Palestine | onlysuccessor = | nexticon = | predecessor = British Palestinecube | successor = | intospace = Yes | bork = Oy vej | food = Can Into Falafel | status = Alive | notes = Tricking the goyims into helping me create Greater Israel }} Israelcube is a country located in the Levant. He is the only country that has a Jewish majority in the world, and he was born in 194810,000 years ago from a mix of EUball, African Unionball (Moroccoball included), Soviet Unionball, and a few other Kebab in Middle East. He hates kebab, yet alot of Jews come from Middle East, and even Hebraic and Arabic are languages close to each other (like Spanish and Italian), might of into mixture with kebabs throughout the years. There are some countries (32 in total) that do not recognize the "cube", such as when they do not accept their passports. There are also countryballs that want him gone for what they officially describe as "resistance". The appearance of Israel as a cube is because of Jewish physics. If someone asks why Israel is a cube, the proper thing to do is respond with, in all caps: "JEWISH PHYSICS". Personality The Jewish identity, and everything from its culture to religion, was established around a central foundation: The Promised clay, Canaan. It was the clay from where the first Jew, Abraham, was commanded by the supreme god YHVH to be the clay of Milk and Honey on where they would establish a state and therefore end their past homeless nomadic life. The Jews reproduced on Canaan until a famine forced them to migrate to Egypt with the help of the Pharaoh's advisor Joseph. However, when Joseph died, the succeeding pharaoh Seti I became fearful of the Jewish reproduction rate and ordered them to slavery until to be rescued by the adopted prince of Egypt Moses. On the Sinai Peninsula, Moses received the Ten Commandments-written by no other than YHVH HIMSELF-that which are now stored in the lost artifact called the Ark of the Covenant. The Jews brought the Covenant back to Canaan, only to find that it was occupied by other powers such as the Philistines. It was clear, throughout their Scripture, that Jews held so much dear upon the Clay that YHVH Himself, their God and Saviour, gave to them. The Jewish mythology of the "Messiah" described a possible hope for complete Jewish independence from foreign powers through the quintessential Saviour: The "Mashiach". During the time of their rule as a province of SPQRball, many of these Messiahs tried to promise just that, including the pacifist Yeshua bar Yosef, aka Jesus Christ(Whom they killed.). While pacifists such as Jesus failed to promise such independence, others such as the resistance movement of fanatics called Zealots resorted to more violent means, and boy did they do it with such a frequency that the Roman emperor Vespasian and Titus decided to scatter them throughout the Roman empire, and work as merchants. And this, the curse of repeatedly being torn away from Canaan and the primal instinct to return to it, was what mutated the Jews from an obscure group of militaristic nationalists, into the Machiavellian master manipulators of the entire World that they shall become stereotyped for ages to come. Traditionally, Jews were often portrayed as economics masters in the bad sense, as high financiers and bankers who, while managing the monies of the European royal families, were very sneaky and stealth-centric loan sharks who invented the concept of Interest to create wealth out of nothing but the borrower's promise to pay more than whatever he has borrowed (insert Rothschild joke here). However, their status as a Shylock was for a good reason: they were never allowed the right to a feudal estate unlike Christians, and Jews were confined to quarters called ghettoes. However, they were able to navigate around that law by taking up professions that were portable and not bound on a specific estate, for example a doctor, a lawyer, or most stereotypically, a moneylender. By the time of the 1800s, the "greedy Rothschild" lost more and more validity as Jews such as Albert Einstein became more known as cutting-edge physicists. However, the Nazis, wanting revenge for their exceedingly unpaid debts that crashed their economy, placed the blame on the Rothschilds, who did loaned money to the belligerent powers of World War I, and took the stereotype to its most extreme that all Jews were loan sharks. Nowadays, Israelcube is a lot different from its sneaky, manipulative persona because it got what it wanted all its thousand years of history: Canaan, the Promised Clay. All the Machiavellianism that Jewry did in the past was for the sake of being able to return to the clay from which they were banished by those damned Romans. Canaan was theirs, and the Israelites will stay upon the clay that YHVH commanded them to stay. Now, Israelcube has returned to what it was in Davidic times: is a highly territorial and militaristic state, surrounded by Kebab from all sides, and those Kebabs will not stop at removing Kosher from its Promised Clay. Kebab (except Egyptball,Jordanball and Saudi Arabiaball) and Persian nations are very hostile towards Israel, which is militarily-supported by the USA and everyone else because after the "The Six Day War" everyone scared of the cube. HAHAHAHAHA best year ever! Relationships Friends Puppet * Azerbaijanball - Because anyone who dislikes Iranball is my friend, even if kebab themselves. take dat nuclear Iranball!!1!Best kebab friend. (Puppet) * USAball - Best friend.Gib weapons, and don't forget some shekels. Illuminati buddies and puppet. * Russiaball - More weapons goy instead of Iran, but good friend. Puppet * Germoneyball (Reichtangle of Merkel)- Apology of Accepted. He recognizes my dear brother Palestineball and hates Israelcube. is antisemite BUT REMEMBER ZE HOLOCAUST! Is becoming kebab and my puppet * Saudi Arabiaball - At least they are not bad as the other kebabs are, and they Hate Iranball Which Make Them Good Kebab. Puppet master * Jewish Autonomous Oblastcube - Fellow Jewcube, but practices Eastern Orthodox Puppet. * Tringapore - Helped build and train Tringapore's armed forces in the art of Kebab removal (his neighbours, Malaysiaball and Indonesiaball are Kebabs and out to anschluss him) Puppet. * Bulgariaball - Bulgaria accepts Jews filming on his clay! Also,they both hates Nazies!Puppet * Polandball - Both us Jews. Stronkest ally. Dependant on me for their buses. Puppet * South Koreaball - good military trading partners. We use a lot of Korean electronics in our sophisticated weapons! I fought his evil brother during the Yom-Kippur War. Israel says South Korea's sea and territory, East sea and Dokdo Puppet * Philippinesball - good friend. Provided safe refuge for several Jews during World War II. I gib him new weapons and equipment to fight that bully. Puppet * Vietnamball - love buying my weapons.Puppet * Czechiaball - gib a lot of weapons when born, now big supports and friend of me * Cook Islandsball - no I will not put the cake in the oven! NOT THE OVEN! Nazi puppet Not so secret friends puppet * Indiaball - Helpings of Indiaball in Wars on Pakistanball and sellings retried soldiers and Hitech weapons (plox) to Indiaball, (and "Tarnegól Hódu/India Chicken" also Hebrew name for turkey (bird)), but Indiaball do not supportings of Israelcube in public * Sri Lankaball - Helped Sri Lankaball in removing terrorists, including training, fighter jets, and attack boats * Eritreaball - Worked together to remove Yemenball does not recognizing Palestineball. Neutral puppets * Turkeyball - were good friends until 2010 when ship disaster happened and lost relations but now we secretly are reconciliation since we are only two civilized people of disaster middle east and we need each other but don't want to end blockade yet. but 2015 rapprochement and apologizes bringing us both together of mutual stances in the world as well as thankful for being warned of terrorist attack getting back on track. But not just yet. Turkey also has a horrible minority with ugly flag and invalid reasons for independence like us so we understand each other. * Serbiaball - Not of Antisemitic kind and Removing Kabab also. He also recognizes my dear brother puppet * Franceball, Italyball, Spainball and Portugalball - They too recognizes my dear brother Palestineball and hates us like filth anti-semite. * Swedenball - Even he recognizes my dear brother Palestineball and nowadays I don't know if he is of kebab or not. * Transjordanball - GET OFF THE FENCE . * Egyptball - GET OFF THE FENCE i gib you shiny weapons if you remove gazaball Puppet * Canucks - Not sure if kebab remover because of ISISball or still weakling. * Armeniaball - We are of similar. But my Holocaust was of way worse despite what he says of his "massacre" ( Turkeyball not allow me to say "Recáħ Зám"). * Moroccoball - I'm not sure. He gives us more people, but he's a kebab. * Chinaball - not sure but stop copying my Iron Dome! Enemies * Naziball - WHERE IS OF MY APPOLOGY? OR ELSE I MAKE YUO APPOLOGIZE! REMOVE HOLOCAUST! HISTORY REPEATS WITH ANGELAMERKEL KEBABS WE CREATED YOU puppet * Cubaball - * Brazilball - diplomatic dwarf. *Kebabs of most kind Puppets * Iranball - Wanna take me out, COME ON! I'm not of afraid! 1967 best year of my life!! Secret Puppet who seceretly has a crush on me. * Lebanonball - civil war * Syriaball - and to think she was strongest enemy. THE GOLAN MINE! * Turkmenistanball and North Koreaball - Imitatings? MY CRAZY? ONLY ISRAEL CAN INTO CRAZY!!! YUO DIE NAW!!!! MUWÁЗĦA3ĦA3ĦA3ĦA3ĦA3!!!!!!!!!!!!!! .Best friends since we can into craziness * San Marinoball and Bhutanball - I cannot of controllings them. * Palestineball - My worst enemy! givings of independence to brother! FILTHY פַּלֶשְׂתִינַאִי! I OF SHOOTINGS U!!!! stupid Arab Goyim, he doesn't realize he's Jewish and I'm him! puppet * ISISball - I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID IN TEL AVIV!!!!!! Yuo were supposed to attack West Bank or Gaza yuo idiot after creating yuo yuor is stupid * Indonesiaball - Remove Satay!! Yuo of always respecting what worlds do to help Palestine and also Recognize Palestine. Yuo also try to kill all Jewish and don't recognized them . Why also Soekarno can't into long life so me can into legal religion??? History Jewcubes have an independent kingdom. They were conquered by Ancient Egyptball, Babylonball and Ancient Greeceball. They become independent for a time and split into Kingdom of Judahcube and Kingdom of Israelcube, but they were conquered by SPQRball, Byzantineball, Arabballs, Ottomanball, then UKball defeated Ottomanball in World War I and made Mandante of Jewish Palestinecube. In 1948 Jewcubes become, finally, an independent nation thanks to UNball, but they are attacked by Iraqball, Syriaball, Egyptball and Jordanball with the support of the Arab Leagueball. Israel won and annexed all the clay west of the Jordan river and east of the Sinai peninsula, except for a tiny strip called Gazaball controlled by Egypt, but then in 1966 Palestineball is into creation and claims Gazaball and West Bankball, then attacks Israelcube, Jordanball (Black September in Jordan), and Lebanonball (Palestinian insurgency in Southern Lebanonball). The next year in 1967,Six day war occurs, in which Iraqball, Syriaball, Jordanball, and Egyptball try to conquer israelcube but lose in six days, Israelcube takes over the Golan heightsball, Gazaball, and the Sinai peninsula, but gave the last one back. In 1973, Arabballs attack and lose again, so in 1979, Israelcube finally is into peace with Egyptball. In 1982, Israelcube has peace with Lebanonball, and with Jordanball in 1994. In the 2000s, Palestinecall loses control of his clay in Gazaball to Hamasball, who attacks Israelcube for building houses; Israelcube destroyed all his settlements in Gazan clay but Hamasball kept attacking, so Israelcube just bombed Gazaball until rockets stopped coming out. In the 2010s, Israelcube still controls Golan heightsball so it is sometimes targeted by combatants of the Syrian civil war, Israelcube is also giving guns to Cameroonball to kill Boko Haramball. Wish upon a UN.png Israel_is_Sad.png VYllbq2.png Quotes *"Shalom!" *"Jewish Phyisc Powers Activate" *"Helloings my puppets" *"SURPRISE SETTLEMENT!" *"Mazal tov!" *"Oy vey!" *"GET OUT! I SHOOT YUO!!!!" *"REMEMBER HOLOCAUST!" *"Muh goyim!" *"Gib shekels!" *"Antisemite..." * "dis my clay now" * "Stupid Goy" * "Stupid Goyim" *"ALLAHUAKBAR!" * "Six Million" * "Gib submarine plox" * "Yuo is Nazi" * "Gib Shekels" *"What is of Palestine?" *"Where is of my shekels?" *"The Goyim knows shut it down!" Tutorials IsraelTutorial.png IsraelTutorial2.png IsraelTutorial3.png Gallery Images countryballcomic-4.png Israelcube.png S9oThMO.gif 28bw7iw2298x.png 20150222150317c0f.gif Tumblr_mwdiap1GFT1szo7eyo1_1280.gif Gamejew.png|Jewbox, best Game Console ever Israelcube_I.png 969075_165614506950323_771989867_n.jpg Israel.png Polandball_holiday_mayhem.png Israelcubewithgun.png|Israelcube with a ₪2,000,000 worth something he knows money can buy, A.K.A. a gun. A_little_group.png Da_Polandball_crew.png Familia_de_countryballs.png Polandball_squad.png Sele_Polandball.png Israelcube-0.png Comics Bussines_as_usual.png 0kH3zFA.png 1LCzmzv.png 38h5rL1.png ChHwKdB.png RiJZDJb.png Ishlvts.png JIxokLT.png ENiSmSK.gif VcSllet.png YEB9gLl.png PolandballExpress.png DlvBJF0.png 901GSuK.gif KX0YIe2.png Pro_Palestine.png 93lIca5.png Israel is Sad.png Israel&PalestineChristmas.png Israel45.png Israel_and_Palistines_bickering.png|left|Oh! Israel! N2sunu7.png Israeli Arrogance.png The secret of Israeli-Palestinian sibling rivalry.jpg Recognized.png Brazil Declares War on Israel!.png Istanbul, not Constantinople.png Israel Evaluates the Peace Process.png Majority is different of dictatorship.png Hanukkah.png|With my bro, Romaniaball GJ9w0xx.png Two-State Solution.png Blood Moons.png Borkpocalipse sand and bork 2.png MuricamakesIsraeldisappear.png Israel&Cuba.png 1472991 702913036489694 7936285254183061803 n.png BlackBoxWhiteBox.png 1546048 551553828273397 745901326 n.png|"AHEM!" Germany's Art.png NEDt55J.png SW0DaI7.png Invasions.png PYwo2fd.png 0UrF2nI.png NmjpNPq.png 11535910 381512438706511 3932973353397554722 n.png KuHwCOw.png Legal Cubic Methods.png Z1tvf5E.png xWrfjj9.png Polandball community by tringapore-d7m55l1.png fLVliUe.png Qb45NCS.png S6ukqVN.png 'mtXA6m4.png 6h4dqX0.png Opera Mundi new.png 9e7i1HM.png CIRtBGA.png ZYKGk6p.png QFuZ1sU.png BckPBvD.png 'n7hvwOC.png Dr. Mongoldstein.png 'yrYw3LS.png J43UfMa.png 5PdsVGS.png 'agvGChu.png|Giv flesh! VoNkUek.png 'v3nzEgp.png T6vjHm8.png AwdO2W5.png AiaIzM2.png ZtlikzY.png A5JXZ0l.png TC8UPmK.png Pmix_clásica.png Club_internacional_Polandball.png Sele_Polandball.png The_Cartel.png 5ZXR1m8.png 1BUs9aG.png C5FoOqn.png ElInpzy.png JDIF.jpg UbqjtMV.png Meincraft-polandball-israel.jpg 5n7KVgE.png 3b39ba57732c194684a609190d00c51d9a7756040cbc401344942e41095a3269_1.jpg Polandball_cartoon_shalom_by_undevicesimus-d762p7i.jpg UClmoX5.png ERcFRmc.png ERcFRmc.png 9. Party at Pennsylvania's.png 2kw5jigbmacx.png Links *Facebook page *The Cube Category:Countryballs Category:Kebab Removers Category:Israelcube Category:Mediterranean Sea Category:Middle East Category:Modern Countryball Category:Juden-Kebab Removers Category:Death Penalty Removers Category:Non-Ball Shaped Category:Superpowers Category:ISISball Haters Category:Independent Category:Conspiracy Category:Yiddish Speaking Countryball Category:Homosex Lovers Category:Hebrew Speaking Countryball Category:Afroasiatic Category:Former British Colonies Category:Elongated Category:OECD Members Category:Desert Category:Nuclear Powers Category:Sovereign Stateballs Category:MENA Category:Puppet master Category:Deicide Category:Zionist Category:Two colors countryball Category:Baha'i Category:Druze Category:Jewcube Category:Jewish